Selfish, Shallow, and Self-Absorbed - Sixteen Writers on The Decision Not To Have Kids

I don’t think I learned too many new things by reading this book, but it was a good exercise in building empathy for people who decide not to have children. I don’t really know where I stand on this, and being a man, maybe it’ll be a decision I’ll never really have to make. It certainly won’t be a decision that’ll mean the same thing to me as perhaps my future wife or partner. But none the less, it was important for me to read this book and I’m glad I did.

Maybe one reason I feel like I didn’t really get anything deep and true out of this book is because the decision to or not to have kids isn’t some huge, moralistic thing. Consequently, expecting some big moralistic truths to come out of a discussion not entirely tied to moral categories makes little sense.

I could’ve done with a little less “I don’t want children…but I love them!” as a defense against having children. It’s too bad that someone’s ability to be loving and caring is brought into question just because they don’t want children.